"My Daddy told a story about my Uncle Robert," she begins.

"He is a pilot with the RAF and his plane got hit. He had to parachute out over enemy territory and all he had was a flask of whisky, a pistol and a knife. He drank the whisky before he landed in the middle of 20 enemy troops. He shot 14 of them with the gun, but he ran out of bullets,so he started killing some more with his knife. He took out 4 of them, but then his blade broke, so he had to kill the final 2 with his bare hands."

"Good Heavens," gasps the teacher. "What kind of moral did your daddy tell you from this horrible story?"

"Stay the fuck away from Uncle Robert when he’s had a drink!"